Don't believe that marriage separation has to be the end; I made it and so can you.Marriage separation is not an easy task. It puts a strain on your family, your job, and everyone you come in contact with. If your spouse wants a trial separation, or just wants’ separated, try to avoid it. Sometimes this will be possible, and other times not.
Our counselor suggested fairly early in our sessions that we need a marriage separation, stating my wife needed to work on herself. I was willing to do anything at that point, so I agreed. Hindsight being 2020 I think I would've tried something different. What was supposed to be six months turned into a year and a half. There's no way to know what would've happened had we not separated. My wife might tell you different, she would probably say this had to happen. I'm not sure that I agree with that. You’ll feel like running to somebody else- resist this temptation. Keep your focus positive; never stop believing your marriage can be rebuilt. This will be harder on some days than others; believe in the happy ending. A positive attitude is 98% of what it will take to get through it. Stay away from people or books that are not positive. 
You might be wondering will separation work;
nobody can tell you the answer to this. If this has to take place, you might want to set some
marriage separation rules.
Guidelines for what life will look like while you're separated. You might include in your rules; no dating, what days of the week each of you will have the kids. Consider anything that will help you argue less.
Things you should not do. Don't spy on your spouse; don't check their cell phone messages, give them there space. If you don't; they will run away even farther from you. I know you’ve heard, “if you love someone let them go.” These are words you must live by at this point in your relationship. You must not smother them.
If your spouse is talking about separation and divorce; choose separation. What they tell you today does not necessarily mean it will be true tomorrow. Time is not your enemy; it’s your friend. My wife's feelings changed almost weekly. Getting through those changes is the hard part; but you will get through them. Give them time and space; I cannot stress this enough.
If you squeeze too tight you will lose them. So as the song goes,
“hold on loosely but sometimes letting go is the only way.”
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The separation survival guide
Over the last few years I've been working on this website, trying to help people using my own history. What I've found is many people are either at the point of separation or just separated from their spouses. Separation Rules is one of the main pages people go to. So I decided to make a guide, something that will help you figure things out a little faster.
I wanted to make it very affordable so anybody who needed my help would be able to purchase it. The small purchase price of 20 dollars will help me keep the website up and running. I hope that you have benefited from my own personal journey. I think you will be even more satisfied with the separation survival guide.
Thank you again for helping out, sincerely your friend Ira